Something's Gone Wrong Again!

December Wrap Up

2008-12-30T13:10:00.003-05:00

Christ, what has it been - 3 months with 1 post? Does anyone care? Well, this is done purely out of obligation and with hopes for reaching1000 posts (21 to go after this). So December...

I was sick from the day after Thanksgiving to the until the 3rd week in December with a nasty cold and sinus infection. I finally went to the doctor which resulted in some Zithromax. I began to feel normal again around the 19th or 20th, which was way too long to be sick
Those around the Northeast are already aware, but we had a nasty ice storm blow through Eastern NY and New Englad which resulted in 555,000 customers being left without power. Even though I didn't lose power this still sucked for me as one of my responsibilities at work is dealing with the Outage Management system. Needless to say, it was a stressful 5-6 days monitoring the system round the clock, made worse by dealing with illness.
When I'm not carrying a pager and performing life support on a mission critical application I spend my time at work participating in a project to replace the failing OMS system. This requires a ton of travel, so much so that I feel I spent more time in hotels since the beginning of October than at home. You know it's bad when you're scanning hotel porn saying "Seen it, Seen it, Seen it, oooo Cougars!". The good news is that due to the shitty economy the company is scaling back on travel. I'm hoping to spend most of the winter in Syracuse (I can't believe I'm saying this) vs Westborough MA or Long Island.
Jesus H, 65" of snow already. The snow blower is ready for a mid-season tuneup, and we're less than 10 days into official winter.
Little enthusiasm for Christmas this year. Had my parents and my brother and sister-in-law packed into our too small house. Kinda weird, but no fireworks. My kids spent Christmas Eve vomiting while my wife and I spent the night stripping beds, and washing vomit out of kids hair. Lovely. I give this Christmas a "4" on a scale of 1-10. I did get all of the books I wanted, so yeah for me.
My fucking teeth strike again. 3 days before Christmas I had a dental implant put in. It was supposed to be a $500 crown lengthening, but the decay was so extensive that the tooth was marked as hopeless. So my present to myself for Xmas was a $3000 dental bill. For that I got a tooth extracted, a hole drilled into my jawbone, a bone graft, a titanium screw, and a bunch of stitches. And Vicodin, which while nice, still aint worth $3K. There goes that big screen plasma I had been eyeing. Even sadder, is that this single tooth has cost me over $6000 during it's lifespan: $500 worth of fillings, $1000 root canal, $1000 crown, $3000 implant, and another $1000 for a new crown in the near future. Fuck me.
On to sports. I'm relatively happy with the hiring of Doug Marrone as the new SU football coach. I had wanted Skip Holtz or Turner Gill, but Marrone presents himself as a good fit. And really, how can it be worse? You did see this, right?
Don't get me started on the Bills. Another season in the toilet. Jauron has to be fired, right? I mean, how can he go on? If he is the decent person everyone says he is he should resign.
NFL Playoffs: without any analysis, straight shoot from the hip I'm going Indy/Giants in the Superbowl for a Manning brother show down. I like Indy to take it all, but don't ask me why.

I think that's it for the moment. More in 2009, I think.

Mandatory Check-in

2008-11-25T12:02:00.002-05:00

Let's see, since I last posted here I've been on the move most every week: Long Island, Western Massachusetts, Albany, Boston, Raleigh,Houston, Long Island, and Boston again. I'm pretty much beaten by the travel and meetings associated with work. I'm in Syracuse this week, and looking forward to a quiet Thanksgiving with the family. Then, back on the road for the next 3 weeks before the Christmas break. So, yeah, I'm just writing here for the sake of writing. My thoughts on the election, the NFL, SU, and my fantasy teams are old and outdated.

And with that, I plan on spending the remainder of the afternoon scouring the web for turkey brining techniques. Happy Thanksgiving!

September Round-up

2008-09-30T12:29:00.004-04:00

After a half dozen or so abortive post attempts since my last post, I figured I'd simply sum up the past 3 and half weeks:

Today is my beautiful daughter Emma's 5th birthday. I can't believe how big she has gotten. This past Saturday we had a party for a bunch of her friends at Syracuse Tents and Events, which was excellent. Nothing but bounce houses and excellent service. I highly recommend this place for a reasonably priced kids party
Big week ahead. Em's birthday, Elle's birthday Thursday, and our 6 year anniversary on Sunday. We're planning a nice getaway this weekend to Old Forge to do what parents can't do at home: sleep.
The scale stated 278.5 lbs last week, down 2.5 pounds over 3 weeks. I'll take it.
I wish we could hold the god damn election already and get it over with. I can't stand listening to another month's worth of McCain's lies. Sadly, I used to respect this guy. I'm hopeful that in 2 months or so we'll be able to look back and laugh at what a comedy of errors and poor judgement the McCain-Palin clusterfuck delivered.
Really, Congress? You're going to pass on doing something to help stave off what is potentially the greatest financial crisis of our generation because your constituents are against fat cat bailouts? Listen, the average American is a fucking moron, and they don't have a fucking clue what about what is happening. You just might need to do what's best for the country vs ensuring re-election.
Note to self - stop checking 401K at this point
Go Bills! 4-0 for the first time since 1992, which is better than anyone could have imagined. I thought we would be 2-2 at this point. As a fan, I'm feeling the change. When the Bills have the ball, I now have confidence they will move the chains. When the D is on the field, I expect them to shut down the other team. This is exhilirating. I can't wait to see them in person 10/19 against the Chargers
Fire Greg Robinson now - I think he is actually trying to lose games at this point (punting from the opponents 38 yard line on 4th and 1, substituting a true freshman for a senior with the game on the line).
My fantasy team sucks. Big time. 0-4. I traded Drew Brees for Ryan Grant and Torry Holt, which has turned out to be a big mistake. Darren McFadden has been underwhelming to this point, but Chris Johnson has been a nice surprise. I can't seem to make the right decisions, resulting in me leaving winning points on the bench in 3 of my 4 games. I know there are 10 weeks left, but it's feeling like a lost season all over again

And that's that. More in October. Go Bills, Go Obama!

Weightloss, it is a Mother...

2008-09-05T13:11:00.004-04:00

The past month of dieting and exercise has been trying, to say the least. I've had to travel for work every week since the beginning of August, which makes things difficult. My self control seems to go out the window when I'm on the road, and exercise becomes an after thought. Add to that a week with the folks and the wheels are dangerously close to coming off. Gym trips have been 1-2 per week vs the 3-4 I was targeting. My blood sugar numbers have started creeping up again. The scale this morning registered 281 lbs, a net loss of only 2/10 of a pound since 8/8.

crap.

I have a couple weeks of travel on the horizon, which I'm praying I can keep under control. I'd love to be 275 by the end of September, upon which I'll be back at my evil endocrinologist's office. 275 will put me at a net loss of ~18 lbs since the end of June, which would be a nice 3 month effort. I'll try to exhibit restraint this weekend and hit the gym twice. As anyone will tell you, this is hard goddamn work, and I'm hating every second of it.

It's Time for NFL Football!

2008-09-04T16:57:00.002-04:00

And this year, I feel pretty OK about my Buffalo Bills (ignore that rant a couple of weeks back). An improved defense, solid RB, and caretaker QB will offset a depleted O-line (Jason Peters, you're a big disappointment) to turn in a winning record. The first couple of weeks will be rough, but it gets easier from there. Here's how I see things breaking down:

Sun. 9/7 SEATTLE SEAHAWKS (loss)
Sun. 9/14 @ Jacksonville Jaguars (loss)
Sun. 9/21 OAKLAND RAIDERS (win)
Sun. 9/28 @ St. Louis Rams (win)
Sun. 10/5 @ Arizona Cardinals (win)
BYE 10/12 BYE BYE
Sun. 10/19 SAN DIEGO CHARGERS (loss)
Sun. 10/26 @ Miami Dolphins (win)
Sun. 11/2 NEW YORK JETS (win)
Sun. 11/9 @ New England Patriots (loss)
Mon. 11/17 CLEVELAND BROWNS (win)
Sun. 11/23 @ Kansas City Chiefs (win)
Sun. 11/30 SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS (win)
Sun. 12/7 MIAMI DOLPHINS (win)
Sun. 12/14 @ New York Jets (win)
Sun. 12/21 @ Denver Broncos (loss)
Sun. 12/28 NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS (loss)

10-6. Really. And I think that means playoffs, baby!

Labor Day Recap

2008-09-02T12:25:00.003-04:00

Ah... I've been off since last Thursday, and goddamn if it wasn't a relaxing time. My folks have been in town since Wednesday night. Weekend breakdown:

Thursday was spent doing... nothing. Which was wonderful. Just hanging out around the house, my parents distracting the kids. All good.

On Friday the house went wireless, with installation of a wireless router. I can now use my work laptop anywhere, which will make things less contentious on the weekends

Despite some bad weather early on, we spent a great afternoon picnicking with the extended clan on Saturday at Green Lakes State Park.

We enjoyed Green Lakes so much we went back Sunday to take the kids to the beach. We had fantastic weather from Saturday afternoon on. Temps in the high '70's, blue skies, low humidity, simply wonderful.

lots of grilling, including some nice slow cooked/smoked ribs yesterday. Tasty

Saw the Bee Movie on DVD about 800 times. Kids loved it, but hopefully they'll move on soon

Finished my fantasy football draft. Eh. It's all a crapshoot anyway.

SU laid a big turd on Saturday, which wasn't unexpected. This was the first stop on the Fire Greg Robinson tour, which will hopefully end much sooner than the expected 11/29 finale.

It's Time For College Football!

2008-08-29T21:25:00.003-04:00

pic courtesy Three Idiots on Sports
And that can only mean another craptacular campaign for theSyracuse Orange. Entering year 4 of the Greg Robinson reign of ineptitude I have no expectations. The o-line stinks, there is no one to catch the ball, and the defensive backfield looks dangerously overmatched. The only brightspot is the trio of running backs (Curtis Brinkley, Delone Carter, and Doug Hogue) and defensive lineman Arthur Jones. Last year I set the bar high and predicted a 5-7 record, which was naively optimistic. This year, I honestly don't see us going beyond 2-9, with potential wins over Akron and 1-AA Northeastern. Sadly, these aren't gimmies. And as of now, 'Cuse is an 11 point underdog to Northwestern. Gah. This year I'm hoping for the best, and prepping for the worst. And if things go bad, this has to be the last year for Stinko Robinson, right? Regardless, Go Orange!

Aug. 30, 2008 at Northwestern (L)
Sept. 6, 2008 Akron (W)
Sept. 13, 2008 Penn State (L)
Sept. 20, 2008 Northeastern (W)
Sept. 27, 2008 Pittsburgh (L)
Oct. 11, 2008 at West Virginia (L)
Oct. 18, 2008 at South Florida (L)
Nov. 1, 2008 Louisville (L)
Nov. 8, 2008 at Rutgers (L)
Nov. 15, 2008 Connecticut (L)
Nov. 22, 2008 at Notre Dame (L)
Nov. 29, 2008 at Cincinnati (L)

New York State Fair Concert Roundup

2008-08-29T14:49:00.003-04:00

Basically, it sucked. Well, actually, Heart were pretty good. Journey was a wankfest, they could have been a cover band. I still enjoyed "Separate Ways" though. About 1/3 of the way through I realized that Journey are "motivational speaker" rock. "Don't Stop Believing", "Change for the Better", "Be Good to Yourself", the list goes on and on. Cheap Trick - well, we missed Cheap Trick while dealing with the hordes of '80's humanity attempting to find their seats in the Mohegan Sun Grandstand. Let there be no doubt, the grandstand is an awful place to see the show. To sum up:

:Too crowded
:No ushers/security
:no signs for seats
:awful sound

And the fair itself was just a let down. Too many (fair) people combined with the fact I never had a chance to get a fried dough left me disappointed. On the plus side, the wine slushies were awesome. Too bad they're not 32oz. anymore (10 oz, for crissakes). Anyhow, I'm fully loaded on the fair and will be fine for another decade.

And for Boski - it indeed was Camaro/Mullet heaven.

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Fuck You, TruGreen

2008-08-28T15:22:00.003-04:00

Really, your dececptive billing and sales practices are well known. Shame on me for not realizing this earlier. Last year, when your slimey sales guy sold me an aeration and overseed it was on the premise it was a one-off work. Lo and behold, I come back from Philly and I have a $455 bill from the asswipes at TruGreen Syracuse for a service I never agreed to. Well, apparently I did agree to it when I didn't forcibly cancel my service. What the fuck? They stated I authorized this work, and yes I did, one time, in August 2007. Wait, this is normal? I believe I will be investigating whether or not I can submit this to the NYS Attorney General's office.

I'm probably stuck and out some cash, but I wanted to warn anyone to think long and hard before they engage TruGreen:

1.) Anything they sell you they will continue to do in perpetuity
2.) Everything rolls over. You must explicitely request termination of service, and even then that doesn't guarantee they'll stop coming.
3.) Don't be surprised when they stick it in your ass somehow.

The list is long:
TruGreen Government legal actions
Consumer Complaints

Oh, fuck it - just Google TruGreen Complaints for the full list. Caveat Emptor!

A Friday in August

2008-08-22T13:35:00.000-04:00

At work, things seem to be settling down for the weekend. I'm officially cutting over to cruise control for the rest of the afternoon, as next week promises to be busy (travel for work, my folks visiting, vacation days). This weekend promises to be interesting, in that I make my triumphant return to the New York State Fair for the first time since 1998. My plan is to eat everything in site (Operation Get Healthy or Die Trying can take a breather this weekend) and suffer my way through the Journey, Heart, and Cheap Trick concert (yes, really. don't ask). If I survive my interaction with fair people I plan on taking it easy on Sunday.

Yep, gonna take it easy I think

Veepstakes

2008-08-22T12:19:00.002-04:00

I'm trying, so help me I am, not to get as emotionally involved in this years election as I did in 2004. I'm an Obama guy, no doubt about that, but I'm setting myself the expectation that we will be forced to endure at least another 4 years of Republican rule.

Whatever

Sometime before tomorrow is over we will know Barack's running mate, and no one inspires great confidence in me in terms of their ability to overcome the McCain low blow machine. In no particular order:

Tim Kaine - seems like a nice guy, but relative lack of experience will be chum for the Repubs
Evan Bayh - a safe and sane choice
Joe Biden - I like Biden, he brings what is needed, but I'm not sure he is the best fit
Bill Richardson - I don't think America is ready for a black and a hispanic on the same ticket
Kathleen Sebelius - Replace "hispanic" in the above line with "woman"
Chris Dodd - honestly, just too weird looking
Hillary Clinton - what, are you out of your fucking mind?

If I'm placing money on this, I'm putting $2 on Biden. And I'm covering myself by placing another $2 on Bayh.

As for the Republicans, Leiberman would be the most interesting because it would cause Ann Coulter's head to explode, which would be a very good thing indeed. My money is on Mitt Romney, as it appears that Satan himself has taken his name out of the running.

Home Sweet Home

2008-08-20T12:40:00.002-04:00

After spending a couple of days in the big city and surrounding environments, I'm glad to be home to simple, humble Syracuse. Notes from the road:

The drive from Syracuse to beautiful Farmingdale (Long Island) was uneventful, which is just about the best thing that could happen on a 6 hour drive
Plans for visiting Jones Beach were scrapped Thursday afternoon due to some nasty thunderstorms. The evening was spent inside at the Towneplace Suites (a nice place, btw). Good times!
Friday saw piling into the family roadster for what was arguably the worst 3 hour drive ever, through Queens, Brooklyn, Staten Island, and the godawful state of New Jersey. Those people are fuckin' animals, down there. Animals!
Once in Philly, things got much better. A couple of delicious meals from Illiano's (cheesesteak stromboli!), and T'dori, kids playing nicely, and of course, alcohol
Saturday we visited Dutch Wonderland in Lancaster. A great amusement park geared for kids. Sadly, I was unable to partake in one of the best things in the world: Amish pretzels. Big, soft, and delicious (kind of like yours truly)
Sunday, the Philadelphia Zoo. While the zoo was good and the kids had fun, Sunday was not a good day for me. Heat + crowds + traffic jams + kids = one big fucking meltdown. Well, not just one, but several that built on top of one another. Honestly, I think I was still worn down from the travel and the day before. All that, capped with a 4 hour drive home. What a day.

Other notes

Discovered the awesomeness of touch screen ordering at Wawa. Extra meat, and the option to put bacon on everything makes life grand
The EZ-Pass may just be the greatest invention ever, outside of toll free roads. Between the NYS Thurway, Penn Turnpike, and Jersey Turnpikes nickel diming me every 50 miles and the "are you kidding me?!??" tolls for the Tappan Zee, Throgs Neck, and Verrazano bridges I would have had to carry $50 bucks around for tolls.
Pennsylvania is under permanent highway reconstruction. How can they continually work on I81 constantly? Oh wait

All in all, a fun, but tiring weekend. It's good to be home.

Trading In/Up

2008-08-12T12:37:00.004-04:00

Why this post is coming out in August is beyond me. Perhaps it was the let down of another baseball season, or the impending football seasons, or simply hitting rock bottom. Basically, I'm seriously contemplating trading up in all of my sports allegiances. I've been a fan of all these teams fro close to 25 years, and frankly all it's brought me has been a lot of misery. First and foremost:

NFL - I hate to say goodbye to my beloved Buffalo Bills, but I simply can't stomach it anymore. We had nice, albeit heartbreaking, run in the early 90's, a small resurgence in the late 90's, but nothing but dreck since. Cheap ownership, questionable management, poor coaching, and marginal talent have lead to 8 straight non playoff years. After watching this past weekend's pre-season game it's hard to believe anything will change this season. I can't do it anymore.

But I need something to fill the void. I refuse to root for another AFC East team, and the NFC is nothing but a bunch of girls. Therefore, I'm aligning myself with the Pittsburgh Steelers - hard-nosed, proven winners, blue collar. My kind of team. I originally had considered the Cleveland Browns, but that's just more of the same.

MLB - Peter Angelos has finally broken me. The Baltimore Orioles were once a proud team, but after 15 years of Angelos the team is a shell, with no end in sight. It's tough to stay engaged in a 162 game season, tougher still when the team is mathematically eliminated before May. So it's time to move on.

With a burning hatred for both the Red Sox and the Yankees (and once again, the NL is for sissies), I'm going with a left field choice - The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. Second choice, Cleveland Indians. I went with the Angels due to spending three years following them in the mid-80's. Plus, they turned out to be pretty consistent winners. Cleveland is purely based on geographic proximity, and my love for Major League

NHL - Two seasons ago the Buffalo Sabres looked poised to win it all, then the let their two best players walk. My pessimistic side says it will be a long time before we get close to the Cup again. Out of all my favorite teams, the Sabres are in the best position to pull a surprise. But fuck it, I'm punting on the NHL all together.

College Football - it's a goddamn shame what has happened with the Syracuse University Orange. Poor recruiting, incompetent coaching, and bad hiring decisions have left SU in a position where they are the underdog against MAC teams. I'm at the point where I don't think this program can be salvaged at all, even with the long overdue firing of Greg Robinson. At this point I'm considering spending my Saturdays watching Colgate. Go Raiders.

But, I'm looking for wins and victories. So I'm dropping SU in favor of..... Oklahoma. Why? Because they win, and I like their helmets. I never said I wasn't simple.

NBA - fuck the NBA

So there it is, all my sport paraphenalia related to the Bills, Orange, O's and Sabres is going into the garbage. Starting today, I'm a fan of teams that win, and win often. I think this will result in major positives in my life. My teams will be winners, and therefore I will be a winner. Amen

Too Much Fun For Just One Person

2008-08-08T13:44:00.003-04:00

Hectic week, with more of the same in the future. To recap:

Work last Saturday night, a great way to interrupt a weekend
Up at 4:00 AM Monday for a trip to Melville, NY
Two long days of OMS/DMS meetings - pure excitement!
a nice Italian dinner on LI, and a delicious Monte Cristo at some diner on NY 17 were the highlights of the trip.
The lowlight was the George Washington Bridge/Cross Brox nightmare. I'm definitely not a big-city person.
Fever and chills, for two days, possibly related to the nagging tooth ache on my lower left side
Despite eating out and doing no exercise, the scale registered 281.2 lbs this morning. That can't be right, can it?

And now, more of the same. This weekend has me working overnight Saturday, going to Long Island next week (with the whole family in tow), and then heading from LI to Philly for a long weekend with our friends in Plymouth Meeting. What could possibly go wrong?

GHoDT update

2008-08-01T13:56:00.002-04:00

We'll see how long I will keep this up, but as I planned, Friday will be the day I keep myself honest with world (or the 3 people that check in, hoping to find out what to do with old currency or if Greg Jeffries is a homo. Hey, that's what my site stats are telling me, but I digress). This AM the scale registered 283.1 - I lost another pound. While I'm happy, I'd like to be losing more. We'll see how the next week goes, I expect it to be difficult as I'm traveling the first part of the week. As for now, I'm going to enjoy the remainder of this vacation day before working again tomorrow.

Getting Old Fast

2008-07-29T12:36:00.002-04:00

No, not me - carrying a work pager. Actually, it's work in general. About 4 months ago I got thrown into the on call pool supporting the outage management applications. There's a lot to know to handle this (Oracle, Smallworld, web, MQ Series, VB, etc.) and honestly, of the 6 of us on call no one knows it all. Which makes things interesting. Carrying the pager is a dreaded chore that each of us has to endure for a week once every 6 weeks. I'm currently on call now, and I've dealt with 6 callouts in the past 24 hours, which makes me one grumpy camper. In addition I'm in the middle of coordinating a project that requires all updates be done off hours. I worked a weekend two weeks ago, and I'm scheduled to work both this weekend and next weekend. I'm just drained at this point, with no end in sight. I really don't have much of a leg to stand on when it comes to work, they pay me well and generally appreciate me. But man, my ass is dragging at this point, my mood is sour, and if someone doesn't give me something delicious to eat I'm going to snap.

Have I mentioned I'm hungry?

As if on cue, the goddamn pager just went of again. Kill me.

And This Time I Mean It

2008-07-25T12:49:00.000-04:00

After last months traumatic visit to my evil endocrinologist (not blogged, too graphic) at which I was told I'm going to die a horrible and painful death, that losing weight is a piece of cake, and that I'm a disgrace to my wife and children, I decided two things:

Find a new doctor
Jump start Operation: Get Healthy or Die Trying.

Now, this is about the 112th time I've tried to restart this thing in the past 12 years, but I'm hopeful that this time is different. In the past I would cut back for a day, maybe even a week, and tie it all in with a token visit to the gym.

This time, I've made some significant changes. I've been eating breakfast at home, skipping the cafeteria, Dunkin Donuts, and Mcdonalds. I've also been sporting a reasonable, light lunch (courtesy my wife). I've been eating smaller meals more frequently, which has helped me to avoid episodes of overwhelming hunger. Most importantly, I've been hitting the gym three (trying to four) times a week for serious exercise. Honestly, this is the best I've done at sticking with a program for at least 8 years, if not longer.

I'm seeing the benefits, too. Specifically:

much improved blood glucose control (in the 100 range both morning and evening)
reduced weight. A recent doctors visit showed 5.5 lb reduction in a month. The home scale registers 284.1 lbs (yes, I am indeed a big fat pig)
normal poop like most humans produced.

So, I share this in an effort to keep me going. I deferred a month, wanting to make sure I stuck with things. My immediate goal is to be 250lbs by the new year. It's 1.5 lbs per week, so hopefully I can gut this out.

Plans I Make

2008-07-18T16:56:00.003-04:00

Hopefully, a nice & relaxing weekend is in store. Tonight, hit the gym and then home to hit the sack. Working last weekend, traveling, and a Xanax hangover have left me wiped out. Tomorrow, some chores and then dinner at the the Dinosaur and beers at the Tusk with some friends. Sunday, perhaps some beer can chicken. Mmmm.... beer can.

Broke Into The Old Apartment

2008-07-16T11:55:00.003-04:00

Crap. Apparently evetyone that knows me believes that Steven Page of the Barenaked Ladies is my doppelganger (really, I believe I'm more Morrissey with a thyroid problem. Or George Clooney), so to have this shit go down a short walk from my home is just too ugly a coincidence. No worries though, I have a rock solid alibi. (I was lying in bed, just like Brian Wilson did)

Thank God for the Manlius PD, keeping our town safe from thugs like this.

May I Speak With the Sandwich Maker of the Household?

2008-07-11T12:19:00.003-04:00

I'm establishing a new rule. Any sandwich served on regular sized slice bread must include three (3) slices of lunchmeat. Anything less is unacceptable, and can/will result in me becoming enraged.

As an example of how things should be done, please reference the following example courtesy Primanti Bros. of Pittsburgh, PA

Patriotic Review

2008-07-10T12:49:00.002-04:00

Easing back into the pool by recapping the long Fourth of July weekend. Well, there isn't really a lot to sum up. The Fourth spent enjoying the perfect weather while landscaping, eating ice cream, making Michigan Sauce, grilling dogs, and enjoying restricted view fireworks from the backyard with Emma. The rest of the weekend involved mulch, lots and lots of mulch. Overall, things were AOK.

Hard to believe that even though summer technically just started, it feels half over. Every weekend here on out through Labor Day is booked. And then, of course, the snow starts to fly. Summer in upstate: so beautiful, so short...

Something New

2008-07-09T16:27:00.003-04:00

So maybe the blog reface will help me resurrect this blog. Maybe, but perhaps not. But hell, at least I now have an entry for July 2008

Blah

2008-06-09T16:40:00.003-04:00

May (and early June) have turned out to be 'blah', not so much for the activities but more so for more deteriorating state of mind. Here's a list of things that I should feel excited about, but are failing to float my boat:
>> Promotion at work
>> significant work raise and yearly bonus
>> 2000+ mile round trip drive to Atlanta that resulted in zero, repeat ZERO, fatalities.
>> quality time (and boy, lot's of it) with the family

All in all, May was a wash. Here's hoping the latter half of June results in me getting back on track to my usual moody, temperamental, annoying self. Oh wait...

Bills Draft Roundup

2008-05-01T12:05:00.003-04:00

Overall I think it was a pretty decent draft. We got Leodis McKelvin at #11 and James Hardy at #41. I wasn't too thrilled with the mid round picks, but still it was a decent draft. God, I can't wait for football to rev up!

Draft Time

2008-04-25T12:00:00.002-04:00

The NFL has reeled me in as year round fan, as I am eagerly anticipating the weekend long NFL draft. Of course, as Bills fan I really only care about what the team will be doing with their number 11 pick. I'd be happy with any of the following:

1.) Stand pat at 11 and hopefully grab CB Leodis McKelvin.
2.) Trade back in the first round and grab either Devin Thomas, Limas Sweed, or Malcolm Kelly
3.) Draft Devin Thomas at 11, then trade back into late first/early second round to grab a CB
4.) Draft a corner (McKelvin, Cromartie) at 11, then tren trade back into late first/early second to grab a WR (i.e. James Hardy)
5.) Trade with Philly at 18 for Lito Sheppard, use the 18 to grab a WR

Of course, I'm an idiot when it comes to this stuff. All I know is that as a Bills fan I'd like to walk away from the draft having addressed CB, WR, TE, and perhaps DE and the OL. We'll see. In honor of the weekend, I'm gonna do up the hair Mel Kiper Jr style

A Couple of Prank Laughs

2008-04-23T16:49:00.002-04:00

A couple of months ago one of my co-workers stumbled across the Arnold Schwarzeneggar sound board, and thought it would be great if we could use it on conference calls. Well, one thing led to another, and we stumbled across the following soundbit. The kicker is that women on the other end of the phone sounds exactly like the drunken mountain twat ("'Ol Scotchy") I have to deal with at work:

Perhaps even more entertaining is the sound board prank call from Richard Simmons to a Redneck

Enjoy!

Lost Time

2008-04-22T16:44:00.003-04:00

So where the hell have I been for the past month? Lovely and scenic Massachusetts. Marlboro, Northboro, and Westboro, specifically. I've taken up semi-permanent residence at the Hampton Inn in Marlboro due to constant work travel. If I'm out there any more, I'll have to change my permanent address. For the first time in 5 weeks however, I'm at home for the whole week. A little bit of downtime will be nice. I'll have more later this week, touching on the things that are most important to me: the Bills upcoming draft, the beautiful Syracuse weather, the Ahnuld soundboard, Richard Simmons, and 'Ol Scotchy.

But for now, it's a balmy 78°, sunny, and no boss in sight. I'm outta here

Catching Up - First Full Day of Spring

2008-03-21T16:39:00.003-04:00

Been busy, but wanted to note the following:

According to the Golden Snowball site, Syracuse has received a 108" of snow this season. Seems high, as this winter has been filled with high winds, sleet, freezing rain, gray skies, and green grass. Whatever, welcome Sping 2008!
Had a good time last weekend with Chelle, Russ, and Sue B, but I can't help but feel old when I'm for the night by 11 PM.
My Final Four is as follows: North Carolina, Kansas, Texas, and UCLA, with UNC winning it all. Not that it matters, I'm terrible at this. Although it's now too late, I was pulling for Cal State Fullerton, the alma matter of dear 'ol Boski
Despite being clueless, I have to admit I'm digging the fact I'm doing Fantasy Baseball again. All I need to do is pickup Boof Bonser and Willy Mo Pena and my team is complete.
Miserable drive to and from Marlborough, MA this week. 5 hours of rain, snow and sleet on Wednesday, 5 hours of high winds on Thursday. The payoff? $300 in mileage money. Ka-ching!
Have I mentioned I hate early Easter? No? Well, I do.
While I hate that Easter is early, what I love is the my boy Matty J will be one this Sunday. Not only is he cute as a button, he is also the world's single most effective form of birth control.
For the first time in 2 years, I'm officially on-call for work. No extra pay, no extra reward, but on my deathbed I'll have total consciousness. So I have that going for me, which is nice
TV roundup - now watching Top Chef, Celebrity Boot Camp, Rock of Love, Flavor of Love, Intervention, Ghost Hunters, and Paranormal state. I live for the TV.
I'm off to eat my fill of Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs, Cadbury Mini Eggs, Peeps, and black jelly beans. Happy Easter!

Hello, NIT!

2008-03-13T17:20:00.001-04:00

Crap:

'Nova wins 82-63

Let's see if Nova makes it - I still think the committee won't take 8 from the Big East.

Go Orange!

2008-03-12T11:58:00.003-04:00

I realize now that I don't have a single goddamn post on my beloved Orange. Not that it matters, it's been a frustrating season, with dizzying highs (beating G'Town), and un-fucking-believable lows (losing to S. Florida). All in all, I think this a great young team that will unfortunately be playing in the NIT next week. It's going to take a deep run in the Big East tourney to get an NCAA bid, perhaps winning the whole thing. I just don't see the NCAA taking 8 from the BE, let alone 9.

So with that said, here's hoping for a win today against 'Nova!

Karma

2008-03-11T12:51:00.004-04:00

To quote Chelle, What a Dumb Ass. When Spitzer stated "Day One: Everything Changes" apparently he was referring to the quality of pussy he was capable of bringing in. Wow. Karma is a bitch, ain't it Eliot?

Exciting Day at the Granby Walmart

2008-03-10T12:41:00.000-04:00

Who doesn't like to celebrate a grand opening?!??

Man caught masturbating outside new Wal-Mart

Oswego County, NY - Not everyone who attended Wal-Mart Supercenter's grand opening this weekend was there to shop.

Several people called the Oswego County 911 Center sometime after 8 p.m. Sunday after seeing a man masturbating in a pickup truck in the parking lot of the new Wal-Mart on state Route 3 in Granby, state police said.

When troopers arrived, they found John D. Gates masturbating in the passenger's seat of his 1991 Ford Ranger pick-up truck.

"Arriving patrols found Gates sitting in the passenger seat of his vehicle while he was still attempting to complete the act," state police said in an e-mail. "Gates was in plain view of customers that were leaving the store."

Gates, of 3296 Main St., Mexico, was arrested on the following charges: Public lewdness, criminal possession of a controlled substance (possessing hydrocodone tablets without a prescription) and unlawful possession of marijuana.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you John D. Gates

Awesome

2008-02-15T11:38:00.003-05:00

That one word sums up yesterday, my 36th birthday. A quiet day at work, delicious homemade dinner & cake from the wife, birthdat hugs from the kids, and some cool presents. All in all, this is pretty much the top of the best birthday list. And with today's vacation I now embark on a 4 day weekend (cell phone is off). Happy Valentines, Susan B Anthony, and Millard Fillmore days!

I'm In Trouble

2008-02-12T16:45:00.000-05:00

For reasons still not clear to me I let my buddy talk me into purchasing and managing a fantasy baseball team. This is something that I haven't done in probably 9-10 years. I knew I was in trouble when I looked at my roster and realized I only recognized 12 out of the 31 players on my roster (it's a keeper league). To make matters worse I've already received trade feelers that involve players I've never heard of. It's pretty pathetic I have to reply to these emails and state "Sorry buddy, but the players you named all sound made up. If you have Gary Gaetti and want to move him, let me know".

Yep, I can safely say that this is the worst $100 I've ever spent

Scotchy McDrinksAlot Strikes Again

2008-02-08T10:56:00.000-05:00

Talk about timing. Last weekend I was talking with the wife, Chelle, and Swarley about our psychotic co-workers. Now it appears all this talk has angered the psychotic twat gods. I won't go into the painful details, but each day this week has seen increasingly agitated emails and phone calls from my drunken coworker 'ol Scotchy (AKA Sarge AKA The Poisonous Cunt AKA Lucifer Herself), all of which I ignore. I'm so tempted to send back a fuck you-a-gram, but I need to make sure my lottery numbers hit first. Oh how I would love to cave her head in with cinder block, but you know, evil never dies. Christ almighty, work shouldn't be this stressful. And Pam, the following is for you:

Now go eat a bag of dicks, you freakin' twat!

This Feels Good

2008-02-05T15:42:00.000-05:00

No doubt about, the Patriots loss to the Giants was very rewarding. It doesn't make up for those Bills Super Bowl losses, but this is about as happy I've ever been with a Super Bowl outcome. Why, you ask, do you hate the Patriots with such a fiery passion? Let me list but a small sample of the reasons:

They're good (no doubt about it)

They're a division rival (and they are good)

They copyrighted "19-0" and "19-0 The Perfect Season" before the game was even played. What a bunch of arrogant fuckers

Bill Belichick is "genius". Sorry, Einstein and Tesla were geniuses. Belichick is an arrogant, classless, overrated asshole who should thank Satan himself that Drew Bledsoe was injured in 2001, forcing him to insert Tom Brady. If you don't agree, take a look at his stint in Cleveland 1991-1995. I look forward to seeing Belichick dragged through the mud this coming off-season, with the congressional inquiry into Spygate and the sour taste he left as a result of his miserable Super Bowl coaching job.

Tom Brady is the second coming of Christ himself. Sorry, Brady is a good quarterback but three Super Bowl rings doesn't automatically trump the likes of Elway, Montana, Marino, and Unitas. I'm sick of seeing Brady's smug, self-satisfied face all over everything, ~~what with the smoldering eyes, pouty lips, rock hard abs, etc.~~

Randy Moss for a fourth round pick. WTF?

Say what you want about Roy Williams, but there's no doubt in my mind that Vince Wilfork is the dirtiest player in the league. He fits in with coach, no doubt.

I'm not sure, but I think Tedy Bruschi and Junior Seau are homos. OK, that was uncalled for.

There's more, but I've run out of steam. But today the air smells better, food tastes better, everything is just a little bit better. God this really does feel good.

Superbowl Sunday

2008-02-03T13:07:00.000-05:00

After a great night out (Papa Gallo, Juno, and Chelle and Swarley rocked!), I feel it's only right that I make my Superbowl Prediction:

New England 42 New York 27

I'm rooting for New York in this one (or rather against the evil stain that is the Patriots), and think it will be a close one. Ultimately, the Patriots organization has sold their collective souls to Satan and really can't be beaten. I would relish walking into work tomorrow with a New York victory, just to stick it to the Massholes I deal with daily. Sorry, I can't help the hate being a bitter Bills/Orioles fan

Whatever, all I really care about are the sausage rolls and chicken wing dip I'll be enjoying during the game.

We Did It!

2008-02-01T12:39:00.000-05:00

Syracuse made the list! Syracuse made the list! We've been added to the list of 60 cities/regions nationwide at greatest risk for terrorist attack.
Best (out of context) quote:

"This is welcome news for the Syracuse area"

- Sen. Charles Schumer, D-NY

We're somebody now. This is the kind of spontaneous publicity that makes a city into something special. I can feel it, things are about to start happening for us in the 'Cuse now. Welcome Al-Qaeda terrorists, have you heard about our proposed mall expansion?

I think We're Set for Saturday!

2008-01-31T12:15:00.000-05:00

Looks like were going to be seeing Juno, playing at 7:50 at Shoppingtown. We've agreed in principal on food - Mexican (awesome). We're probably going to head out to Papa Gallo in Fayetteville, which looks a bit pricy. As a stand by I offered up Jalapeno's (one of my favorites). Here are the menus for comparison.

Papa Gallo
Jalapeno's

Either way, I'm psyched.

Bad Day at the Office

2008-01-30T15:46:00.000-05:00

My company has just announced that we will soon be moving away from offices and cubicles to the dreaded "open workspace" plan, which I believe is designed to move high paid employees out of our company to be replaced by eager young developers. I expect what you'll see below is a taste of the wonders to come:

glumbert - Bad Day at the Office

Movie Decision

2008-01-28T16:52:00.000-05:00

Once again, I'm happy to report that the biggest source of angst in my life at the moment is deciding which movie to see this weekend as part of our biennial night out with Chelle and Swarley (it's been 15 months - 15 months - since last time. WTF?). I'm thinking either Juno or Cloverfield, but I'm not sure what others are thinking.

I won't even go into the angst about where we're doing dinner - I'll let someone else decide that one.

Pleased By Refrigerator Policy

2008-01-23T17:22:00.000-05:00

If I didn't know better, I'd swear we have a writer for the Onion working on my floor. I've doctored some of the info, but this is sounds like a blow-by-blow breakdown of mid-level manager and professional stickler Johnny Cashler:

Syracuse, NY— Johnny Kashler, 44, office manager for CNYPowerCompany, told reporters Monday that he is very happy with his revamped work refrigerator policy, calling the utility company's previous guidelines "obsolete" and "not conducive to a healthy, productive work environment." "With the old policy, there was zero accountability, no initiative to label personal food items, and no limit on how many pieces of fruit people could refrigerate," said Kashler, who spent the last six weekends drafting the five-page document. "The great thing about this policy is that it doesn't force a completely foreign refrigerating experience down anyone's throat. It's the perfect stepping stone to get to where we want to be two years from now." Kashler said he knew the policy was a success when no one responded to the office-wide e-mail he sent out describing the changes.

I thought my co-worker had made the whole thing up, but he just changed the names. I'm sure the blog audience in general won't appreciate this, but if you know Johnny K then you'd swear it was based on him.

Life's Tough Decisions

2008-01-22T17:26:00.000-05:00

This one has been weighing on me all day, and now I need to decide:

Will dinner be jambalaya or soft tacos?

I'm agonizing over this like Sophie's Choice (another benefit of the remarkable low stress day at the office I enjoyed)

A Nice, Quiet Day at the Office

2008-01-22T17:03:00.000-05:00

Really, things were dead quiet today. No emergencies, no meetings, no developer meltdowns, no anti-IT correspondance - nothing. Is this what it's like to work at a normal office? With the customer project completed, my high availability project out for RFP, and my business transformation project not starting for another month I may cruise through President's Day with only minimal work stress. Now this is the utility company career I signed up for!

Week in Recap

2008-01-20T10:46:00.000-05:00

While the past month at work has been crazy, the past week really takes the cake. I've been working as part of a team implementing a new customer system in our NE service territory, which has resulted in 70+ hours of work for me this week - a shock to a system that barely can carry 40 hours. Bottom line, I'm wiped out (though yesterday provided enough "holding pattern" time to allow me to fuck with the template yet again.) So yeah, more boring dreck in a sea of the utterly ordinary.

And with that out of the way, here's my football picks
New England 106 - San Diego 10
Green Bay 17 - New York 14

More Playoff Picks

2008-01-12T15:34:00.000-05:00

Nothing to surprising last weekend. Here's my picks for this weekend

Green Bay 31 - Seattle 24
New England 35 - Jacksonville 31
Indy 28 - San Diego 20
NY 27 - Dallas 21 (a change from my earlier thinking)

Holy Moly!

2008-01-08T13:26:00.000-05:00

Nothing eases the winter blues like 67° and an abundance of sunshine. It's freakin' beautiful out. I went for two mile walk and lunch and sweated through 2 shirts - just like summertime!

And while I know we still have 3 months of gray skies and snow ahead, this is splendid little reprieve. Thank you, Satan!

Winter Blues

2008-01-07T17:14:00.000-05:00

As happens every January, I'm now mired in my post-holidays/mid-winter funk. I feel like shit, the Xmas bills have arrived, the house is falling apart, football season is over, work sucks (but they pay me), and we still have another 2-3 months of winter. Not much to say really, but one of these January days I'm gonna flip the fuck out and just go psycho on everyone.

Someone care to lure me out of the clocktower?!?? (pizza and margarita's usually do it).

Official NFL Playoff Picks

2008-01-04T16:36:00.000-05:00

Dude, it's the Patriots. Why bother?

OK - here's my picks for the playoffs

This weekend:
Jacksonville 27 Pittsburgh 14
San Diego 31 Tennessee 17
New York 21 Tampa 13
Washington 35 Seattle 31

Going Forward:
New England over Jacksonville
Indy over San Diego
Dallas over NY
Green Bay over Washington

Indy over New England (wishful thinking?)
Dallas over Green Bay

Indy over Dallas to win it all. Take it to the bank!

Holiday Wrap Up

2008-01-04T11:25:00.000-05:00

Well, the holidays have come and gone. While I love this time of year, things have been so hectic that I'm looking forward to some quiet downtime in early January. The holidays were marked by dizzying highs, terrifying lows, and, of course, stunning amounts of phlegm, diarrhea, and vomit. The roundup

The Good:
** Had the folks in town for Christmas, which is always great. As much as they can make me nuts, it wouldn't feel like the holidays without them.
** This was the first year both girls flipped out over Christmas - both were excited about Santa, opening gifts, reindeer. It was awesome.
** Man, did I eat like a pig. Sausage rolls, beef tenderloin, dips, lasagna. Anything and everything in sight went in my mouth.
** I think I can count my presents on one hand, but that's OK - the kids had a blast and I treated myself to a handful of PS2 games to tide me over until spring.
** Catching up with my grandparents and aunts in Rochester
** A nice visit with my wife's brother's family, in from Chicago.
** A small but fun New Year's Eve party.

The Not-so-good
** 54 inches of snow to date, but a green Christmas - WTF?
** Chest colds. Everyone in our family has spent the past two weeks coughing and hacking. My wife was diagnosed with bronchitis, but me, I'm holding out for full-fledged pneumonia.
** Stomach bug - my dad had it last week, my mom caught it this week, my daughter had it this week, and my son still has it. Every other person who has come into contact with us has walked away with the squirts at minimum.
** The most non-relaxing vacation ever. I was technically "off" work last week, but I was called with issues daily, culminating in a whopping 17 hours spent in the office this past Saturday. As usual, the future only promises more of this type of bullshit.

The Bad:
** the Bills season mercifully ended. And don't even get me started on the joke of a bowl schedule for college football. Kudos to West Virginia for whipping Oklahoma.

That's It

2007-12-21T15:56:00.000-05:00

4 PM on the last workday before Christmas - it's silent here as I'm one of the last ones still in the office. I'm so tired from the last couple of months that I can barely keep my eyes open (but that may be a diabetic reaction to eating a jumbo box of Dots). I'm off now for a week (kinda - have to work next Thursday and Saturday), and I can't wait to head home, play with the kids, relax, drink eggnog, take in a holiday party, enjoy my parents company, and eat everything in sight.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

This and That, December Edition

2007-12-11T16:38:00.000-05:00

Christ almighty, only one post in the past 2 months. Catching up on things:

> Work has been hectic for the past 2 months attempting to get a new project approved. Hopefully it will all come together with the fourth and final governance meeting this week. Once complete, I plan to go on auto-pilot through Jan. 1
> Tomorrow I get to drive to Woonsocket, RI for work. Woonsocket. Name just cracks me up. Doing a little digging, it turns out that Woonsocket is home to a large number of Frenchies. Weird, and honestly it freaks me out a bit
> Tree, lights, and decorations are up. Even with all of this I'm still not feeling the Christmas spirit.
> If anyone's keeping track, I finished dead fucking last in my fantasy league. The only plus is that I get to pick first in next year's draft. Hello Darren McFadden!
>Real life football is better, with Buffalo being 7-6 and realistically in the playoff hunt. Not too surprising, with me picking the team to go 8-8 this year, but I really never thought we would be talking playoffs in December
>My brother came into town for the weekend and we caught the Bills-Dolphins game. Despite 6 hours in the car, 5 hours in the cold, and sleet it was fun. I still prefer the game on TV though, half the people in our section weren't even watching the game. Too much drinking and and idiotic belligerence for this to be more than a once year thing for me

As I read over this list I realize it's nothing but work and sports. How pedestrian my life has become.

If you don't see me again, Merry Christmas, Fuckface!

November Check In

2007-11-13T12:40:00.000-05:00

I'm still here, though I doubt anyone was getting concerned. The past 3 weeks of work have been torturous, lots of travel to Boston and Long Island wrapped around a week long workshop I had the joy of moderating. Hopefully things will settle down with the holidays approaching, and I can get back to bitching about the Bills, the Orange, and all sorts of other related nonsense.

Complaints

2007-10-16T17:11:00.000-04:00

I could use this time to detail just how annoying it is working next to ace coder Rod Mandingo (future post), or how I'm a magnet for obnoxious, loud-mouthed jackasses (future post), or how bad my fantasy sucks this year (not a future post, I'm spent), but I'm tired, agitated, and fighting a cold. Instead I'm going to head home, have a bowl of soup, drink 3 tablespoons of Nyquil, and hopefully get 13 hours of sleep. That should make everything A-OK!

Enthusiasm

2007-10-12T17:35:00.000-04:00

I wish I had some more enthusiasm heading into the weekend, but I've been in a funk all week, mostly due to the suddenly gray, damp weather and those goddamn Buffalo Bills. Despite what I expect to be a fun a party this weekend, I'm expecting more doldrums due to weather and lousy football (SU and fantasy, mercifully a bye week for the Bills).

So with that, I wish you a good weekend (you fucking morons)

Condescencion

2007-10-12T17:19:00.000-04:00

A new direction. I'm so tired of the smug, condescending pricks I encounter day in and day out that I've decided to fight fire with fire. It's not in my nature to grandstand, boast, provide back handed compliments, etc. So rather than going that route, I'm just going to end all of my conversations with the words "you fucking moron(s)". I feel I've earned the right to use it, after consistenly listening to people who aren't qualified to lick my nut sack speak down to me and others.

I mean, if I was on the receiving end such a statement I'd appreciate the directness of the statement. While you may be shocked and surprised by this new approach, you'll ultimately be thankful to know just exactly what I think of you.

So, any questions from you fuckin' morons?

Real Life Superfan to the Rescue

2007-10-09T12:26:00.000-04:00

And then there's this. Just when I needed a laugh Mark Miller steps up to the plate. He out-farley's Farleys original Superfan:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPHHpEdC_8Q

God Hates Us All, Bills Fans

2007-10-09T12:14:00.000-04:00

That is, if you live in Western NY and follow the Bills. What have we done wrong? Why are we being forced to suffer so much pain and heartache? I mean, "Wide Right", 3 additional Super Bowl losses, the "Music City Miracle aka The Big Assfuck", and now this season? What the fuck? There wasn't much hope going into this season, but a last minute 1 pt loss to the Broncos, a ridiculous amount of injuries, and now this crowning kick in the nuts? God, I hate the fucking Cowboys.

Seriously, I'm very depressed about all of the football bullshit this year, between the Bills, the Orange, and my piece of shit fantasy team. I'm one more bad break away from heading to a clocktower.

5 Years

2007-10-09T12:02:00.000-04:00

October 5 marked 5 years of wedded bliss. My wonderful wife stated that statistics show that if you haven't killed each other after the first 5 years, the chances for some kind of psychotic OJ incident really drop. Good to know. We celebrated by dumping the kids on my mom and running off to Belhurst Castle for a night of quiet relaxation that included wine, hot tubbing, roast beef sandwiches and 12 hours of wild, out of control sleep. Effin awesome. I can't wait until another 5 year passes and we can slip away for another night.

A Birthday Miracle

2007-10-02T12:48:00.000-04:00

Happy birthday to my wife, for whom I actually purchased both a card and gift this year. It's a birthday miracle!

Hope you're not expecting cake

We Can Laugh About It Now

2007-09-28T16:49:00.000-04:00

Like pretty much everyone, I was horrified to see what happened to Buffalo Bills TE Kevin Everett a couple of weeks. The prognosis now looks cautiously optimistic which can only mean one thing: It's OK to joke! Courtesy of The Onion

Over-Optimistic NFL Doctor Says Injured Bills Player Kevin Everett Will Fly Out Of Hospital

Excerpting the best part:

"First of all, the trauma to his spinal cord was so extreme that we had to inject chilled saline into his body to induce healing. Second, no matter what Dr. Homburg says, people cannot just grow wings and fly, period, and to tell Kevin that is cruel. He probably won't even play football again." Dr. Homburg said that, while he appreciated Castillo's cautious approach, he was only in partial agreement with his colleague.

"Sadly, I'm afraid it's true that Kevin will never play football again—the league cannot afford to give the Bills the sort of unfair competitive advantage a flying tight end would offer them," Homburg said. "It's a lot like how Steve Young and Troy Aikman had to retire when their concussions gave them telekinesis and the power to stop time. Still, for Castillo to just dismiss the idea of Kevin's more-than-complete recovery out of hand is cynical and unprofessional. Like many injury-related issues, while it may be based on sound medical practices, it goes against everything the NFL is about."

"Also, I should make it clear that I'm not saying Kevin will actually 'just grow wings and fly,'" he added. "It could be from magic, a rare form of spinal helicopter blades, or small jet boosters emerging from his feet. We have to keep an open mind about this."

And then there is this, funny for all the wrong reasons (via Deadspin)

Busy, Slow, Busy

2007-09-28T12:18:00.000-04:00

It's been a hectic week work wise with travel and meetings. Today, though, work is a ghost town - 5 of the 8 people in my work group are off and things are nice and quiet. I'm enjoying a quiet day of surfing, throwing out mountains of paper, and napping on the can. Ah, the good things.

I'm conserving my energy because the weekend promises to be hectic. My mother is in town, so tonight the wife and I will attempt to get a "date" in. And by "date" I mean a quick dinner followed by present shopping for my soon to be 4 year old's birthday

The remainder of Friday night will be spent making "goodie bags" for my daughter's party. Unfortunately, my wife didn't warm to the idea of stocking the bags with miniature bottles of liquor, pocket knives, and matches. I still believe that would have killed all future goodie bag thoughts.

Saturday will bring the big birthday bash - a party with 25 four year olds that promises to be ~~a fucking nightmare~~ interesting, to say the least. Followed up with a visit from my aunt and cousins.

Sunday is a repeat of Saturday, substituting adults for kids and minus the goodie bags. Sunday is Emma's actual birthday, and we will be taking her out for the only food she eats - chicken fingers and ketchup. Then, home for cake and bullshit with the extended family.

And, in between everything, I have to find time to get my wife both an anniversary gift and a birthday gift. Not to mention squeezing in 8 hours of football. You know, sleeping in a bathroom stall doesn't sound so bad after all.

The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

2007-09-24T16:29:00.000-04:00

AKA Weekend in Review - 4th weekend in September 2007

The Good
- The weather was beautiful. Fall is officially here, but what a great summer it has been. Warm and sunny with that amazingly blue September sky. Leaves are just starting to turn. Yep, this is the best time of the year in upstate New York
- And with such awesome weather it was a great day to get the family out to the annual Westcott Street Cultural Fair. Even better was the opportunity to watch my wife and her dance troup bellydance as part of the festivities. Lot's of family and frieds showed up, making this even better for Ellie. She did great, and I'm so proud of her for getting up in front of all those people and doing her thing. It's amazing what losing 40+ pounds and overcoming fears will do for your self confidence.
- Syracuse stunning Louisville 38-35. Wow. Given, Louisville's defense is almost as bad as SU's. But still, some great performances from the team on Saturday. Greg Robinson is still an ass clown, but for one afternoon it was enjoyable to be watching SU football again.

The Bad
- Despite the beautiful weather I was pretty much chained to my computer as our department was running through a mock conversion of Customer system. It would be so bad except I was told I had to work at 5 AM Sunday morning. In actuality, I ended up waiting until 5 PM to day any work. Not terrible, just somewhat frustrating.
- My fantasy team sucks. Specifically my running backs and quarterback. I was shaky coming into the season with only Larry Johnson and Ahman Green and did absolutely nothing to upgrade. Unless drafting dreck such as Reuben Droughns and Anthony Thomas count as something. I'm fucked until Johnson returns to form and Green stays healthy. Unless Drew Brees pulls a miracle out of his ass and scores 31 points tonight I'm falling to 1-2 with no real possibilities for improvement.

The Ugly
- The Bills are just plain ugly, and it's only getting worse with the ridiculous amount of injuries. The slow start isn't a surprise given the murderer's row of a schedule. Still, the injuries, especially on a questionable to begin with defense, have been devastating. Peter King's take:

I think the poor Bills just can't catch a break. Now it's Paul Posluszny, their leading tackler, breaking his forearm and following Coy Wire and Ko Simpson to the sidelines indefinitely. Saw some good things from fellow rookies Marshawn Lynch and third-round pick Trent Edwards, relieving the injured J.P. Losman. But this is going to be a lost season for the Bills. Too many injuries. Not enough time to get them back.

I'm loving Lynch, and will be curious to see what Edwards can do. The offense in general has been stale and predictable, which is bad news for Dick Jauron and Steve Fairchild. The ridiculously stupid Bills fans are smelling blood in the water and calling for their heads - after 3 games!

So that's it. The upcoming week brings a visit from my Mom, a 4 year old's birthday party, and a trip to the dentist. Where's my Xanax again?

On Second Thought

2007-09-19T13:55:00.000-04:00

I'll gladly pay someone $3000 to burn the fucking place down so I can just start over.

Not Football This Week

2007-09-19T12:53:00.000-04:00

No, no bitching about football this week (it is so very, very sad in Bills and Orange land though). Today I have to deal with a more realistic gripe, the state of my sad sack of shit house. There is a whole slate of things that need to be done over at The House That Time Forgot:

replace kitchen floor
replace landscaping
fix leaking tub enclosure walls

and so on and so forth. The foremost issue is getting our tile/grout issue in our tub straightened away. All I want done is to have the drywall replace and retiled. I can't imagine that the material and labor would amount to more than $2000.00. But amazingly, the rep from Leo A. Kline was able to hand me an estimate for $4800 for that work. $4800. Are you fucking kidding me?

And to top it off, just got a call back from the landscaper. It seems I misread their quote - it isn't $3000 to replace the landscaping - it's $4800. What the fuck, is that the magik number for fucking a homeowner in the ass?!??

So, if anyone out there can do my tub for $2000 and replace my landscaping for $2500 then by all means get in touch

Football Roundup - September 13, 2007

2007-09-13T16:47:00.000-04:00

I won't call it week 1, because I'm going to be all over the place. Due to travel, and lack of coverage I didn't get to see my primary teams play last weekend. This was offset by being able to spend Saturday glued to my folks 50" widescreen hi-def TV, drinking beer and watching college football end on end.

Stud Powercock
- My only fantasy team started out strong, scoring 145 points despite mediocre performances from Drew Brees and Larry Johnson. Thank you, Plaxico Burress, and may the Pillsbury Throwboy rain down bombs on you for the next 4-6 weeks. You know, I may just change my team name from Stud Powercock to the Pillsbury Throwboys.

Buffalo Bills
- The Kevin Everett injury is horrific, and I'm hoping he can recover and lead a relatively normal life. Just plain terrifying to see that happen.
- Losing three defensive starters on a weak defensive team may be too difficult to overcome. Ashton Yobouty needs to step up.
- I'm hoping the offense opens things up a bit this week against the Steelers. We're gonna need more than 97 yards in the air.
- Christ almighty we could have and should have won this game. This hurts
- I'm taking the Bills and 9.5 in Pittsburgh. I have a cheesesteak riding on it.

Syracuse Orange
- Another display of ineptitude from this sad sack of a team. I want to like Greg Robinson, I really do, but he's been a mistake from day 1. I'm sorry, but after playing like a JV squad the following happy posi crappy bullshit makes me apoplectic:

So I asked Greg on Tuesday to start his regular press conference, why aren't you mad?

"I'm not mad," he said. "I'm not mad. I'd like things to be better, no question. We all want things to be better. But, mad? No. I don't know what mad does for me. I think that I just have to stay the course and keep demanding, what we're looking for and go from there.

"When you say, mad, in front of us (the media), in essence, what you are is the outside world. Maybe I'm going too far with this, in essence, you're asking, why aren't you going get mad and let the outside world know you're mad. What I'd like to let the outside world know is this, because I know we have a lot of people in this town that want in the worst way for Syracuse to do well. They want us in the worst way to be good. I know that. I understand that. And they're frustrated because we haven't yet given them something to sink their teeth into. That's our responsibility. But that's what I'm doing. I'm working hard to give you and the outside world something to sink your teeth into that you can say, yeah, OK, good. But it hasn't happened for you yet. That's my responsibility and the football team's responsibility and I understand that."

Are you effin kidding me? No vision, no leadership, no fire, nothing. Greg Robinson needs to go ASAP. Shit, if Woody Hayes hadn't been dead for 20 years I'd bring him in to smack some people around.

Buffalo Bulls
- With the 'Cuse in the shitter I'm turning to my alma matter for some inspiration. That 42-7 shellacking of Temple last week has me feeling good. So good, in fact, that I bet my Penn State alum buddy a beer and a sandwich that UB hangs up 30 yards rushing on the Lions this weekend. (He was too afraid to give me the 35 points). I agreed not realizing that Penn State has given up -1.5 yards rushing this season. But I'm confident....

Despair!

2007-09-12T12:51:00.000-04:00

Sadly, I believe this logic is now in place at the Grid. Suddenly the cut in benefits and having to prove your dependents are real doesn't look so bad when you're threatened with being relocated to Boston or Brooklyn. Have I mentioned how much I love the Demotivators?

Back In The Cut

2007-09-10T12:49:00.000-04:00

Enjoying a glorious gray day in CNY after a whirlwind trip down south to see the folks. Notes from along the ways:

Add US Air to my shitlist of airlines. They join Delta, United, and American on the list. Honestly, any airline that isn't on the list is not simply because I haven't flown them. There was anything drastically wrong with our flights, it's just the general indifference to passengers by the US Air personnel. Fuck, I hate flying anywhere anymore.

Terribly hot and humid in North Georgia, but overall I like the area. The relocation bees are making noise in my head again.

The Georgia Aquarium really rocks. Expensive, but awesome.

Sawnee Mountain Reserve is a great little park. Nice hiking, not a lot of crowds.

The occasion for the trip was my dad's 60th birthday. He was so happy to have both of his sons surprise him with a visit. He also loved the navigation system we got him. Things couldn't have gone any better this weekend.

I'll save my football thoughts (pro, college, and fantasy) for another post.

Some How, Some way, It Just Gets Worse

2007-09-04T12:19:00.000-04:00

Are you fucking kidding me?

This was a goddamn embarrasment, even for a team that has a rich history of being embarrassed. The O-line is terrible, the linebackers look like high school backups, and saviour Andrew Robinson looks overmatched. I predicted a 5-7 record earlier, but it's going to be much, much uglier than that.

And a note to the SU Athletic department, if this team is going to get embarrassed on a regular basis at least give the team some dignity and not have them prancing around in these retardculous uniforms.

Bills Football and NFL Predictions

2007-08-31T12:30:00.000-04:00

Well, after watching all four preseason games, reading every article I can find, and suffering the retards on the Bills message boards I'm ready to deliver my opinion on the 2007 Bills:

I Don't Know

I try not be a pollyanna when it comes to the Bills - I have no delusions on the quality of the team. I also try to avoid being a pessimist, as the sky isn't falling. This team won't be very good, but the shouldn't be awful. A couple of pre-season thoughts:

Marshawn Lynch hasn't looked explosive or elusive in games. Too early to be concerned I guess, but it is making me a bit anxious

JP Losman has looked decent, not spectacular. I do love that deep ball though, it's going to keep games in check this year

I know he's too small to be a #2 WR, but Roscoe Parrish sure is fun to watch

The line looks better, but they are going to be severely scrutinized given the $$$ spent in the offseason. I'm optimistic they won't be as bad as everyone fears

While I don't think the loss of Nate Clements, Takeo Spikes, and London Fletcher will hurt as much as people expect. Of course, I would have liked to have seen 1 of those guys retained just for presence and leadership. The CB and LB corp is looking thin right now.

"Bend don't break" - I'm already sick of hearing that

Paul Pozlusny looks to be a good one. As surprisingly does last years #3 pick Ashton Youbouty

Brian Moorman is the man, and Buffalo may be the only city where you can buy a punter's jersey.

And now onto the schedule. The schedule makers haven't been kind, as the road is difficult. It's going to be ugly early (starting 1-5), but by the end of the season things should be OK (8-8). No playoffs though.

Sun., Sep. 9 DENVER BRONCOS (L)
Sun., Sep. 16 at Pittsburgh Steelers (L)
Sun., Sep. 23 at New England Patriots (L)
Sun., Sep. 30 NEW YORK JETS (W)
Mon., Oct. 8 DALLAS COWBOYS (L)
Sun., Oct. 14 BYE WEEK
Sun., Oct. 21 BALTIMORE RAVENS (L)
Sun., Oct. 28 at New York Jets (W)
Sun., Nov. 4 CINCINNATI BENGALS (L)
Sun., Nov. 11 at Miami Dolphins (W)
Sun., Nov. 18 NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS (L)
Sun., Nov. 25 at Jacksonville Jaguars (W)
Sun., Dec. 2 at Washington Redskins (W)
Sun., Dec. 9 MIAMI DOLPHINS (W)
Sun., Dec. 16 at Cleveland Browns (W)
Sun., Dec. 23 NEW YORK GIANTS (W)
Sun., Dec. 30 at Philadelphia Eagles (L)

As for the rest of the NFL, I see things breaking down as follows

AFC East - New England

AFC South - Indy

AFC North - Cincinatti

AFC West - San Diego

Wildcards - Denver, Baltimore

AFC Champ - San Diego

NFC East - Philly

NFC South - New Orleans

NFC North - Chicago

NFC West - Seattle

Wildcards - Dallas, San Francisco

NFC Champ - New Orleans

And there's the San Diego - New Orleans Superbowl I was so desperately rooting for last year. I really care who wins, as long as Chuck Muncie gets his due.

Are You Ready For Some Football?

2007-08-30T12:29:00.000-04:00

Boy, I am. Syracuse begins another campaign under goofball Greg Robinson, and hopefully they will improve upon last years blech 4-8 record. I've promised myself I won't be wasting precious autumn Saturday's watching this team again, but I've never been know to keep a promise. Here's the Orange schedule with what I expect (win-loss only)

Fri, Aug 31 Washington 8:00 p.m. (L)
Sat, Sep 8 Iowa 8:00 p.m. (L)
Sat, Sep 15 Illinois 12:00 p.m. (W)
Sat, Sep 22 Louisville TBA (L)
Sat, Sep 29 Miami (OH) TBA (W)
Sat, Oct 6 West Virginia TBA (L)
Sat, Oct 13 Rutgers TBA (L)
Sat, Oct 20 Buffalo TBA (W)
Sat, Nov 3 Pittsburgh TBA (L)
Sat, Nov 10 South Florida TBA (L)
Sat, Nov 17 Connecticut TBA (W)
Sat, Nov 24 Cincinnati TBA (W)

So there you have it, a 5-7 season for the once semi-proud Orange

Two Years

2007-08-27T16:50:00.000-04:00

It's a rough time of the year. I know that Harold and Emma would have had a hell of a relationship, and I'm so sad we will never got to see them interact. It would have been a hoot. Without Harold, life just isn't as fun loving or interesting :(

Lackluster

2007-08-24T16:14:00.000-04:00

I'm having a hard time mustering any excitement for the upcoming weekend. It promises to be an average summer weekend, nothing more, nothing less. I'm feeling lackadaisical of late, mostly due to work and the fact that I have the aches and pains of 70 year old offensive lineman. Work is mostly due to trying to figure out what the next year or so will bring. The aches and pains? Fuck if I know. My knee hurts, I think I have bursitis in my shoulder, and recently my left arm from my elbow to my wrist hurts lifting even the simplest item.

(And no, it's not masturbation related. I'm right-handed and make use of a special splint for "me time".)

So for this weekend, I expect highlights to be tonights Bills game, italian sausage on the grill tomorrow, and the season finale of Big Love on Sunday. As you can imagine, I expect things to get pretty out of control - I may even stay up past 10 PM. Party with me, punker!

Moving?

2007-08-22T13:03:00.000-04:00

I shouldn't delve into specifics, as talking work related trash on a blog can get you fired.(is that a bad thing?) Lot's of changes afoot at work with the blockbuster acquisition about to go down, and the big question on the foot soldier's minds is "Will I have a job"?, followed closely by "Where will I have a job?". The latter is my concern. Lots of rumors and speculation that us "back office" workers (IT, HR, Finance) will have jobs, just not necessarily in Syracuse any longer. The positions will most likely be moved to one of three locations: Suburban Boston (OK), Long Island (eh), or Brooklyn (no fucking way). Just Ducky.

The bottom line is that if I want to keep working for this company then we'll most likely have to move in the next 2-3 years. I'm now faced with the question of whether or not I want to move (maybe), and if I want to do so for this company (not so much anymore). Crap - I expected that when I joined the power company I could cruise through the years until retirement.

Not that I'm opposed to living in Taxachusetts. I like the area around Westborough/Marlborough. I could definitely live there, and Boston is a great town. The dealbreaker is the cost of living/housing. There's simply no way we could afford a home similar to what we have within 2 hours of Boston. I really don't want to go back to renting, or having to live w/ another family, or having to buy a 2 bed condo.

What does it all mean? Fuck if I know - but decision time will be approaching soon.

Another Year

2007-08-21T13:11:00.000-04:00

Another crappy fantasy draft. I just wasn't into this time, in no mood for the usual ball busting, boasting, slams, etc. Maybe it was the fact it was Monday night and the draft didn't end until 1:30 AM. Or maybe it's that I drafted Plaxico Burress w/ my firt pick. Either way, I'm pretty much indifferent to the team I've put together. Slim pickings all the way around. The good news is that no ones team looks monstrous (unless you talk to my buddy the Doctor, who will tell you his team is the best). Eh, at least I didn't end up with Warrick Dunn again

Draft Time

2007-08-20T16:51:00.000-04:00

Well, it's a little early for my tastes (by about a week or so), but tonight is the redraft for my annual keeper league. I kept LJ, Brees, and not much else. Apparently other folks had some trouble finding four keepers, as co-owners kept around the likes of Matt Leinart, Jeremy Shockey, Marques Colston (at the expense of Javon Walker), and Jerious Norwood. I'm picking at #10, and don't have any expectations about who will be available. I know Marshawn Lynch, Thomas Jones, Adrian Petersen, or Javon Walker won't be around, but I can hope.

One thing I do know: Michael Vick should be available in later rounds

50/50

2007-08-20T12:21:00.000-04:00

Another weekend come and gone. Eh.

The Highlights:
Sunday was perfect day for a bbq, and that's exactly what we did. Had some folks over the house and spent the afternoon eating good food and drinking Corona and Red Cat. Excellent

The Lowlights:
Spent Saturday afternoon getting roped into a problem with work that others should have been able to address. I was an hour from my house with the kids in the van and my phone's ringing off the hook. The best part? My boss calls me, asks for an update, and then asks me to contact another member in our group to ensure he's working on the call. I tell my boss that I'm an hour away from home and don't know this individual's number. My boss tells me "OK, I'll give you his number". And here I am two days later wondering why I had to make the call, driving w/ my kids in the car when my boss, who knows who to call and has the number, doesn't make the call. It doesn't make sense, but I guess that's why he's the boss and I'm a nothing.

I feel that when it comes to work I'm entering the pit of despair again, but that's another post altogether.

The Fucking Yankees

2007-08-16T16:19:00.000-04:00

The Onion nails it right on the head. This is why I've given up on baseball (That, and Peter Angelos has ruined the Orioles)

Fucking Yankees, Reports Nation

BOSTON—Moments after the New York Yankees continued a month-long stretch that has seen them climb from the bottom of the AL East to pull within a once unfathomable four games of the first-place Red Sox by defeating the Baltimore Orioles Monday night, stunned and enraged baseball fans across America took a moment to shake their heads in disbelief and curse dejectedly at the relentless inevitability of Yankee glory.

"Fucking Yankees," said Marshfield, MA resident and longtime Red Sox fan Lawrence Broberg, echoing the sentiments of thousands of men and woman across the nation. "Every year. Every goddamn year."

The Yankees, coming off a decisive three-game sweep of the Central-leading Indians, have won nine out of their last 10 games, catapulting them to the top of the wild-card standings, restoring the team's infuriating confidence, and instilling a sinking sense of impending misery among all non-Yankee fans.

"It's like they can't lose," said Connecticut resident Gerry DiCenzo, who could only watch helplessly as the Yankees overcame a late Orioles rally to win their fourth straight. "They literally cannot lose. Suddenly no one can beat the Yankees. The Red Sox suck. The Orioles suck. Everyone sucks. Everyone suddenly sucks when they play the Yankees."

"Unbelievable," DiCenzo added. "Un-fucking-believable."

Sparked by the recent returns of phenom starter Phil Hughes and slugger Jason Giambi, the Yankees have their full roster healthy and together for the first time since April, which fans around the world have solemnly realized is perfect timing for the stretch run.

"It seems like every time the [sports] ticker comes up, they're winning 10-1," said Chicago resident Jeremy Killian. "You knew this was going to happen. You knew. Right when they got Clemens back, you fucking knew."

"Every time," Killian continued. "Every time with this fucking team. It's the same damn thing every time. You just, they never go away. You can't give them an inch. You cannot give them one inch."

"And Jeter…" Killian added, watching as the Yankee shortstop drove home the winning run in the bottom of the ninth with a softly tapped ball that barely dribbled past the pitcher's mound. "Fucking Jeter."

As the Yankees remain hot in August, the team continues to rely on GM Brian Cashman's strategy of stockpiling cheap, young pitching and assembling a group of talented role players to surround the team's superstars. In recent weeks, rookie reliever Joba Chamberlain and newly acquired utility man Wilson Betemit have stepped up and delivered in clutch situations, much to the frustration of nearly everyone.

"You got fucking Abreu all of a sudden going 3 for 4 every night," Boston citizen Mark Baker said of the Yankees' recent surge. "Fucking Giambi's back. A-Rod's hitting 500 fucking home runs a night. Posada, that bastard. You got Matsui, who's a Red Sox killer. Then there's Shelley Duncan, who no one even heard of till three weeks ago. Guy never hit a home run in his life, he puts on pinstripes and suddenly he's Babe fucking Ruth."

"And this Melky Cabrera guy," Baker added. "Where did this fucking guy come from? Him and Cano. They got guys coming out of the fucking woodwork."

"Fucking Yankee fans must be loving this," said New York resident and avid Mets fan Dave Julian, muting the Yankee broadcast to temporarily silence the grating sound of Yankee cheers. "The smug fucks. And those Yankee announcers. Why don't they root a little harder? They make me sick. Michael Kay. Bet Steinbrenner's laughing it up. Bought himself another fucking championship."

Although the Yankees' schedule becomes tougher in the coming month, with multiple series against the Tigers, Angels, Red Sox, and Mariners, most baseball fans have resigned themselves to the fact that the season is "pretty much fucking over."

"What the fuck can you do?" said Detroit citizen Terry Grey. "Every call. The Yankees get every break, the bounces all go their way. It's luck. They're lucky. They're so fucking lucky."

"Stupid," Grey added. "It's all stupid. Why play the whole fucking season if this is what's always going to happen?"

Despite the mixture of anger, resentment, and disbelief that has surfaced across the country during the Yankees' recent hot streak, most fans have been able to take some solace in the fact that the Yankees will be eliminated by the Angels in the first round of the playoffs

Amen, man.

Fantasy Football 2007!

2007-08-15T12:48:00.000-04:00

It's that magical time of year again. That's right, it's the beginning of fantasy football season. And as always, I'm striving for mediocrity. Last year I bucked the odds and ended up with a winning record, going 9-5 before falling apart in spectacular fashion in the playoffs. This year I'll be lucky if I can come close to that. We get to keep 4 players each year, and I barely have two to keep. Larry Johnson and Drew Brees are givens, but I'm stretching by keeping Donald Driver and Ahman Green. Yuck. And the redraft is going to be devoid of quality backs. I'm contemplating trying to trade draft picks for a quality RB2. The best bet would be Willis McGahee, but then that would required I root for that Miami turd.

So yeah, season is really over before it begins. Goodbye $80.

And as usual, if anyone has a league looking for a new doormat let me know - I'm ind

Still Ain't Right

2007-08-13T12:57:00.000-04:00

Well, the weekend was pretty good with the exception of the 6 hour clusterfuck between 1 AM and 7 AM Sunday morning. Once a month at work there is a 6 hour window early Sunday morning where IT can perform system maintenance, upgrades, etc. Usually it's not a big deal, and I only have to participate 2-3 times a year. Because the work is done off hours with limited resources there is an exceptional amount of planning that goes into the changes. Unless of course your ace coder Ron Mandingo. Now Ron's the kind of coder that has forgotten more stuff than I'll ever know, but he is an absolutely terrible planner and organizer. The changes we implemented Sunday AM was about the worst example of this I've ever seen - forgotten tables, missed views, missing synonymns, compilation errors. It was like watching a monkey fuck a football. My role in all of this was to quality check the implementation. The work was supposed to begin at 2:30 AM, completed by 4:00 AM. Instead, we had to call this jackass at 3:30 AAM to wake him up and remind him he was on deck. And then came the waiting, the false assurances everything was OK, etc until finally at 7 AM everything was working. Fucking terrible. All in all I managed a grand total of 2 hours of sleep Sunday and my ass is still dragging on Tuesday. What's the point of all this? I don't know - other than that I'm close to strangling Mandingo (for a variety of reasons to be covered later).

Other than that though, a nice weekend.

On Tap

2007-08-10T17:00:00.000-04:00

With the exception of the stretch between 2AM-6AM Sunday when I have to work, this looks to be an average weekend. Considering all things, that aint too shabby. The agenda includes watching the Bills first preseason game, sanding down picnic tables, a haircut, and smoking a pork. Plus, Rock of Love Sunday night.

Hi-fives all around.

756 and then some

2007-08-09T13:00:00.000-04:00

As much as it pains me to say, Barry Bonds deserves congratulations on his remarkable achievement in breaking Hank Aaron's all time home run record. Simply put, Barry Bonds is a remarkable ball player. 23 years in the league, 7 MVP awards, 7 Gold Gloves, closing in on 3,000 hits, etc. While the power surge of the early 2000's may be attributed to juice, you can't take away all of the other accomplishments. I say we dismiss all of the talk of asterisks and and whether or not Cooperstown is in his future as bullshit. It's now his record, and will be until some breaks it (A-Rod, I'm looking at you)

And for the record, Pete Rose should be in the Hall as well. As you can tell, I don't give a fuck about gambling or steroids.

At Camp

2007-08-07T12:49:00.001-04:00

My boss is the bomb. Last week, he hooked me up with VIP passes to Bills training camp. In addition, he told me I could go and not take a vacation day. Most excellent. I was able to spend last Friday afternoon in Pittsford taking in Bills practice, and it was awesome. Not that anything particularly memorable happened, but I was in the VIP tent and managed to get free food and beer. Awesome. A couple of thoughts:

Mother of God it was hot. You know it's bad when you have a choice between free alcohol and Gatorade and Gatorade wins

Marshawn Lynch is stud

So is Lee Evans

Langston Walker is dog

The ladies love JP Losman

Lots of TCP floating around (Training Camp Pussy, as the kids call it

Apparently the Jills were at camp, but I didn't know about it. This, along with not punching Robert Royal in the face when I had a chance, was my biggest regret of the day.

All in all, I was like a little kid watching the players up close. A great experience, one that I'm definitely will be doing again with my kids.

And Then There's Thurman

2007-08-07T12:44:00.000-04:00

Congrats to a great Bill. I loved Thurman Thomas, and I was mucho happy to see him get the recognition he deserved at Canton. Perhaps he'll be joined by Andre Reed some day? We'll see.

My Boy Calvin

2007-07-30T16:25:00.000-04:00

What a wonderful day in upstate NY. Two of the games classiest individuals being honored. For me, Cal Ripken Jr has been my lifelong baseball hero. I was a fan when he played in Rochester through 20 years in the pros I always said that I would be there at the Hall of Fame when Cal was brought in, and when the day finally comes I'm 75 miles away watching my daughters flip out because there's a bug in their wading pool. Not that I mind too much, but it still would have been nice to make the trip (though fighting a crowd of 80,000 doesn't sound too thrilling).

Another Anniversary

2007-07-17T17:37:00.001-04:00

I just realized that today marks my 11 year anniversary of ~~saving lives~~ pure tedium. Yep, 11 years working a job I expected to be fired from within a week. I celebrated by beating my head against a brick wall, which was much more satisfying and only half as painful as spending another day dealing with my cerebrally challenged business counterparts. Hell Yeah!

I'll Pass On The Obvious Beached Whale Reference

2007-07-17T17:08:00.000-04:00

God, it's gotta suck to be Martin Rike today. Not just the ordeal, but the fact that this has become national news is really got to hurt the ol' self esteem. I'm speechless, really. This has got to be rock bottom for Rike, right (no pun intended). It might be time to make some lifestyle changes if it takes 50 people to carry your fat ass to safety. (not to mention that boats, hovercrafts, and airplanes all failed).

500-Pound Man Rescued After 12 Hours In River
Grantsburg, Wis. Crews rescued a Pine City, Minn. man from the St. Croix River at Fox Landing, near Grantsburg, Wis. after he spent 12 hours stuck in the water. Authorities said the man's weight was a mitigating factor in his delayed rescue.

At about 8:15 p.m. Monday, authorities received a call of someone with a medical condition needing assistance. According to the Pine County Sheriff's Office, a group had gone tubing on the river when Martin Rike's tube went flat about two miles south of Fox Landing. After attempting to get out of the water and walk back, Rike, 39, began having chest pains. He had also slipped on irregular rocks, injuring an ankle and a knee.

When crews attempted to rescue Rike by boat, they found the water was too shallow, causing the boat to get caught on the rocks. Dispatch said Rike weighed about 500 pounds and said his weight was a factor in how long it took crews to rescue him.

At 5 a.m. Tuesday, a hovercraft was dispatched to try to retrieve Rike, who authorities said remained alert and conscious throughout his ordeal. Soon after, authorities reported the hovercraft effort had failed. "Every resource we had simply did not work until we got down to physical manpower," Chief Deputy Ovick said. "The aircraft that found him said they could not lift that amount of weight."

Burnett County authorities said they were trying to recruit a helicopter from Traverse City, Mich., the closest location with a hoist. Eventually authorities managed to load Rike into a raft made of wood and three canoes. "There wasn't enough water for it to float, so they physically used that as a stretcher," Ovick said.

Some 40 to 50 rescuers took turns hoisting the boat, carrying it two feet at a time until they found a spot in the river deep enough for the boat to float down to a waiting ambulance. Rike was pulled from the river around 8 a.m., nearly 12 hours after rescue attempts began."It was very taxing. It was probably 70 degrees and the humidity was very high last night," Ovick said. "Lifting him, moving two feet at a time, you get tired real quick with 600 pounds of cargo."

Rike was taken to Burnett Medical Center in Granstburg, where he was reported to be in stable condition.

And in other news, Rike was later seen back at the river, enjoying a snack

Nada

2007-07-13T17:28:00.000-04:00

Nothing. Nada. Zippo. Zilch. Nothing going on this weekend. My wife is taking an overnight trip (well earned, I must say) and I'm stuck on baby sitting duty for most of the weekend. Needless to say, I'm thrilled to pieces. Is it wrong to keep the kids in their pajamas all day? Is it wrong to put them to bed at 3 PM in the afternoon? How about leaving them home for just a "little while" while I do stuff? No? Crap.

Have a great weekend.

Peanut Butter Jelly!

2007-07-12T17:28:00.001-04:00

Christ almighty - a co-worker showed this to me earlier this week and I've had this goddamned thing in my head ever since. Now it's time to share the pain.

also fun, the Family Guy version

Note, this works well with mini ravioli as well

2007-07-09T12:36:00.000-04:00

I'm back in the saddle again, after having the past 10 days away from the office. Luckily, first day back hasn't been that bad - so far my apprehension has been unwarrented. Catching up on things:

I'm all hotdogged out after the past week. 3 cookouts stuffing my face with some delicious weiners ended badly when I made the mistake of watching the Coney Island Hot Dog Eating contest. I think I feel a reversal coming on.

Speaking of cookouts, we had a blast at our annual 4th picnic with friends. The next day we piled in the van and met up with family for a cookout at Verona beach. Nice.

And more cookout info, I broke down and bought myself a fancy grill. So far all I've grilled are, you guessed it, hot dogs.

Had my parents for the past 11 days, which was actually quite enjoyable. For a couple of those days we even had my brother in from Houston, along with his wife. 3 days before the vacation I expected this to be a 10 on the clusterfuck scale. In the end, it was a nice time.

Lot's of home improvements during the past week. New mailbox post, new storm door, and a lot of effort to fix a leaky tub. 2 tubes of grout, 2 tubes of caulk, 80 hours w/o a shower and guess what? Tub still leaks. Time for the professionals it seems.

to answer Chelle's question - I am done with my project, but alas I'm not yet free of the fucktards. My "new" boss keeps assigning me work, and my "old" boss doesn't seem to care. Right now, I'm an IS analyst without a home. (but at least I'm still getting a paycheck)

I'm hating summer TV. Watching Top Chef and Ghosthunters and Entourage, trying to fit in Big Love, and ignoring everything else. Nothing promising on the horizon either.

Bills training camp opens in 18 days - woohoo!

My blood sugar on Byetta has been great, and the nausea has passed. Double woohoo!

That's it for the moment. Perhaps some more later when I can figure out how to get the goddamn title field to work on blogger.

And Now the Fun Begins

2007-06-28T12:56:00.000-04:00

The good news is that my project is over. 1.5 million electric customers across Massachusetts, Rhode Island, and New Hampshire will now have their electric outages managed by a new system. It's done, 3 months later than expected, but significantly under budget. Hooray for me.

So the system has been in 48 hours and we are facing severe thunderstorms across southern New England. God willing, she will hold under the pressure. God, I can't wait for my vacation.

Where Was I?

2007-06-25T17:10:00.000-04:00

Ack - too much going on. The good news is that my project for the past 16 months is scheduled to put into production tomorrow. Even better news is that I will be taking all of next week off. Amen man. You know, there's plenty to tell but I honestly don't feel like writing about it. Have I reached the end of my blogging rope? It's not just here, but over at my mp3 blog as well - I'm really struggling to find the motivation to keep churning stuff out. Between work and the 3rd kid, I'm just exhausted.

Byetta

2007-06-25T17:01:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was my first day taking Byetta, a new antidiabetic medication. My A1C control hasn't been very good, consistently above 8. This medication should help, the only downside is that it's injectable. I spent a whole year debating this, and when it came right down to it, giving myself an injection was no big deal at all. Really, it was painless. I wish I had done this a year ago. One of the side effects of Byetta is weight loss, so we'll see how it goes. My blood sugar number this morning was amazing, 80 points below where it normally is. Right now the only downside is some slight nausea after eating and acid stomach, but that should pass. Wish me luck, I need it.

Made in America

2007-06-13T12:24:00.000-04:00

So after having finally let the Sopranos finale settle I realize that all in all it wasn't a cop-out or a waste of time. Some random thoughts:

I realize I love Paulie Walnuts and am glad he didn't turn out to be a snitch or end up as a corpse. It's the facial expressions and the lines. The bit about the Virgin Mary in the Bing was a much needed laugh. Also great, from a couple episodes back, was Paulie talking about the time he accidentally took acid: "You're Uncle June had lasers coming out of his eyes".

I loved Tony in the therapist office. He thrives on it, and I wonder if Tony doesn't believe that it helps make him a better criminal

The whole show has always been about balancing the the (f)amily with the (F)amily. That said, I have had my fill of the (f)amily. You know, they could have taken out any member of Tony's family and I would not have batted an eye. I was almost disappointed that Carm or whiny bitch AJ didn't get something coming to them. As much as the talk of Meadow's career choice and AJ's lack of career choice annoyed me, it did keep true to the series.

Very happy that Phil got it in the end, but the change of heart from Butchie leaves me suspicious. Perhaps that plays out in the unseen ending.

I don't think the cat was Adriana, or Christopher, or Tony's conscience, as theorized around the web. I think there was a listening device in the picture. Who brought that in again? Carlo?

The ending - I hated the cut to black just like everyone else, but I don't hate the idea of not knowing what happens to Tony. The tension was unbearable, but made for riveting television. My initial take was that he survived, and I didn't even consider the possibility he may have been killed until the next day. The two big theories:

Theory No. 1: Chase is using the final scene to
place the viewer into Tony's mind-set. This is how he sees the world: Every open
door, every person walking past him could be coming to kill him or arrest him or
otherwise harm him or his family. This is his life, even though the paranoia's
rarely justified. We end without knowing what Tony's looking at because he never
knows what's coming next.
Theory No. 2: In the scene on the boat in "Soprano
Home Movies," repeated again last week, Bobby Bacala suggested that when you get killed, you don't see it coming. Certainly, our man in the Members Only jacket
could have gone to the men's room to prepare for killing Tony (shades of the
first "Godfather"), and the picture and sound cut out because Tony's life just
did. (Or because we, as viewers, got whacked from our life with the show.)

I will miss this show, which was truly demonstrated by watching the fantastically craptacular John From Cincinatti. WTF was that?

Time

2007-06-11T17:22:00.001-04:00

Has it really been two plus weeks since the last post? Jesus H, I'd like to talk about the Sopranos finale and the Paris Hilton fiasco (gales of laughter peeling out of me on this one), but alas it's the end of another soul-crushing, mind-numbing day here at the salt mines, and I have a whole list of tasks that need attending to (grocery store, grilling dinner, playing with the kids) before the sun goes down.

Big Weekend Ahead

2007-05-25T16:19:00.000-04:00

No, not really, but hopefully it will be relaxing. We have a picnic on Sunday and nothing else, so hopefully a couple of lazy, relaxing days around the homestead are on the horizon. Christ almighty, I can't believe it's Memorial Day weekend already.

That's it - home to relax in some sweet AC.

Sabres, Baptism, Sopranos

2007-05-21T17:02:00.000-04:00

That title sums up the weekend:

The Sabres broke our hearts again, playing an uninspired series against the Ottawa Senators (and really, the Rangers to boot). Talk about a snakebit town. Sad to see all of the fans outside HSBC, knowing it was all for naught. You really don't get better opportunities than this season. A goddamn shame. And a big fuck you to NBC/NHL, who scheduled the game for 2:00 PM and then bailed on showing the overtime in order to broadcast a horse race. Check that, the pre-race show for a fucking horse race. What has happened to the NHL - it's about on par now with NFL Europe.

On Sunday we had our son baptized, and I was surprised but what a nice ceremony the church conducted - Customized programs, music, candles, it was quite nice. For some reason though I was in a shitty mood. Things got tense when we got to the restaurant after the ceremony and had to wait an hour to be seated. Like the brainiac I am, I picked a restaurant about 1500 feet from Lemoyne College, who had just concluded their 2007 graduation. Great. Even better, all of the photos taken that show me looking like a miserable prick. In the end it worked out though, and we all had a good time. Thank you, Grey Goose, for calming my ass down.

Man, I'm absolutely going to cry when The Sopranos ends. Even when it's meh it's still better than 99% of the shit on TV. Last nights episode left my stomach in knots, if only for the beautifully executed curb job Tony laid on Coco. I have no idea what's going to happen, but I expect only one man (Tony or Phil) comes out alive. I highly doubt anything HBO has on the horizon will come close to this show.

Heading for a Trauma

2007-05-16T17:01:00.000-04:00

I haven't been following Celebrity Fit Club too closely this season, but like every sane person in America I'm dreaming of the day Dustin Diamond gets his ass beaten down. The first clip here shows Dustin being a cock, and then being a pussy ("You're gonna go to jail", "I'll call my lawyer"). The real treat here though is the verbal beatdown that ticking time bomb Harvey Walden gives Screech. Unfortunately, Harvey doesn't beat his ass. The season is still young though so there is still time. Via BWE (yo, totally NSFW due to f-words galore)

Another Weekend in the Books

2007-05-14T16:58:00.000-04:00

All in all a nice Mother's Day weekend:

Sunny and beautiful, if a bit chilly. I wish they were all like this.
Got to spend Saturday cooking out at the homestead. My aunt, cousin and her soon to be husband trecked in from Rochester for the day. It's funny how people grow up and mature, I couldn't stand my cousin for years and now I look forward to having them up for a visit.
I'm going to stop watching the Sabres, as I think I'm jinxing them. I didn't watch a full game all season and they kicked ass. Now I've watched two wire to wire games and they've been beat. This may be too big a hole to climb out of against a very good Ottawa team.
Want to to get your neighbors to talk to you? Get a new mower. I spent more time talking about the new rider this weekend than actually using it.
I'm gonna miss the Sopranos when it's all over June 10. Sure, I'll watch Big Love and maybe one or two of the new shows, but Six Feet Under and The Sopranos were the whole reason I got HBO. My speculation on the show is that Phil Leotardo ends up trying to take Tony down. What happens in that situation is anyones guess
Today I don't feel like I'm dying. Surprisingly, this correlates with the fact I haven't eaten crappy food. Oatmeal, Baked Lays, and tuna on dark rye. I feel good, albeit very hungry.
No strike. Pussies.
For the first time in a long time I feel like I didn't do shit at work today. Maybe that ain't such a bad thing every now and then

I Feel Like Shit

2007-05-11T12:14:00.000-04:00

And after reviewing the symptoms I think I may have a thyroid issue.
Fatigue? check
Joint/muscle aches? check
Difficulty swallowing? check
Neck pain? check
Thinning hair? check
Brain fog? check
irregular period? check check check

My god, I've morphed into a 65 year old women. The muscles in my legs ache, my knees and ankles ache, my head feels fuzzy, my neck hurts, and God as my witness, I'm starting to lose my hair. All in all, I just feel wiped out. It may be diabetes related, but who knows. I think I better call my doctor even though I'm afraid of the backlash due to my weight and my blood sugar numbers. Crap, I really hate what I've done to myself.